The Middah Project: Heshvan--Equanimity

Parashat Lekh Lekha ∙ Genesis 12:1-17:27
Middah for the Month of Heshvan: Equanimity

I write to you this week from Jerusalem.

The saga of the foremothers and forefathers begins in this week’s Torah portion with Avram (later to become Abraham) hearing – and acting upon – the Divine imperative to leave his ancestral home – he hears the words “lekh lekha” – get up and go! – and he responds.

This week, the Bay Area Jewish Community publicly reminds itself that we are not immune to situations of domestic abuse. Shalom Bayit, our non-profit agency that supports battered partners in creating a life of safety, has asked spiritual leaders to speak about this issue in the context of this week’s Torah portion. How hard it is to leave a difficult – often dangerous – situation without the support of community. Shalom Bayit reminds us that we must say “hineni- here I am” in order that an abused partner will have the courage to heed the voice of “lekh lekha”.

Particularly in this context, we are reminded that our middah (the ethical soul trait we are exploring this month) of equanimity does not mean passivity.

For the victim of domestic abuse, cultivating equanimity might involve learning to center and to hear the inner voice of truth, reaffirming ones self-worth and not accepting the voice of the abuser as ones own. For the abuser, equanimity may be learning to be less reactive and to modulate feelings of anger and jealousy, looking inward for the source of the feelings, and not projecting violence (physical or emotional) onto one’s partner.

Certainly, the stories of Abraham and Sarah’s family are not stories of mythically-perfect relationships without reactivity and anger. Often we learn about the way we would like to be by seeing examples of how we prefer not to be. As we read the book of Genesis this year, I invite us to allow the narrative to shine a mirror into our own souls.

With blessing for the path of cultivating hokhmat ha-lev, wisdom of heart,


Rabbi SaraLeya

8 Heshvan 5770 Read the rest

Parashat B’reisheit (Genesis 1:1-6:8)

Once again we begin the cycle of studying our holy Torah, plumbing her text for meaning and insight. Genesis’ weekly readings are fast paced. This week the narrative encompasses not only the creation of the world but the archetypal stories of the first family – Adam, Eve and their children.

Last week, as we gathered in the sukkah, Rabbi Jonathan Omer-Man brought us a very deep teaching (from a contemporary Jerusalem text called Bilvavi Mishkan Evneh) about the names Cain and Abel – in Hebrew, Kayin and Hevel.

The root of the Kayin is related to acquisition, possessions – our very way of being in the material world: kinyan is the process of ownership. Hevel, on the other hand, is a word connoting insubstantiality; it means vapor, breath, emptiness, worthlessness. The book Kohelet (Ecclesiastes), read in its entirely during Sukkot, uses the word hevel repeatedly to describe the difficulty the author has in making sense of human existence.

The story of Cain and Abel, then, is not just a story about sibling rivalry that highlights the unintended outcome of jealous, angry, and violent action. The brothers’ names bring us the opportunity to meditate on how a name can affect one’s way of being in the world: perhaps we are asked to contrast attachment with non-attachment. How does attributing these meanings to their names affect understanding of the story?

I invite us to consider this extra layer of meaning to a very old story and to gather together this Shabbat for an even deeper exploration of these ideas.

With blessing for wisdom of heart in our ongoing process of learning and study,

Rabbi SaraLeya
Read the rest

SUKKOT 2009

So we have traveled through the ups and downs of Rosh HaShanna and Yom Kippur, and we now find ourselves in the holiday of Sukkot, where it is customary to eat and sleep in small huts or booths, fragile structures with roofs made of tree branches, corn stalks, or other organic material. One should be able to see the stars through the roof material; this is a time when we are living in a temporary dwelling and the separation between us and the heavens is reduced. The sukkah reminds us of the temporary shelters in which the Israelites lived during their years of wandering in the wilderness, and at the same time it brings us a visceral, embodied experience our vulnerability to the elements, to the passage of time, and to the viscisitudes of circumstance.

On Sukkot we read Ecclesiastes, or Kohelet in Hebrew. You may be familiar with a traditional, and rather bleak translation of the beginning of Kohelet:

Vanity of vanities; all is vanity…

But in a more contemporary translation of the text, Rami Shapiro gives us an alternative perspective on these words and on the deep meaning of Sukkot. His translation, THE WAY OF SOLOMON, Finding Joy and Contentment in the Wisdom of Ecclesiastes, begins:

Emptiness! Emptiness upon emptiness!

The world is fleeting of form, empty of permanence, void of surety,

Without certainty.

Like a breath breathed once and gone,

All things rise and fall.

Understand emptiness, and tranquility replaces anxiety.

Understand emptiness, and compassion replaces jealousy.

Understand emptiness, and you will cease to excuse suffering

And begin to alleviate it.

Solomon, the presumed author of the original text, is passing on his own hard-won wisdom to us, his heirs, on Sukkot. He is telling us that we all fall into the same traps that have captured us for millennia. He is saying that we are constantly trying to get somewhere, accomplish something, all ultimately in a vain attempt to ward off our awareness of life’s impermanence. He repeatedly asserts that we suffer because of our illusions of permanence, separateness, and control.

And just when we feel overwhelmed by the harsh reality which he insists we confront, he offers us his prescription for peace:

Life is fleeting, the passing of moments upon moments.

Embrace them as they come; do not cling to them as they go.

In this alone is there tranquility.

So, this year as we spend time with community in the sukkah, may we be blessed with the wisdom to be present with What Is, savoring the sweetness as it lands on our tongues,

Opening to whatever is in front of us, with trust and faith.

- Laura Goldman, LCSW

Read the rest